Hands Up for the Prenup? Second-Chapter Love and the Case for Cupid with a Contract

Valentine’s Day is all about romance — flowers, declarations, promises for the future. But what if one of the most loving conversations a couple could have… involved a contract?

I’ve watched the prenuptial agreement quietly step out of the shadows and into a rebrand. Currently in England and Wales, prenups are technically not fully binding, but where certain criteria are met they carry much stronger legal weight than in Ireland. In Ireland, they remain in some circumstance ‘persuasive’, but are certainly not enforceable. Its a divisive topic, and a potentially divisive instrument, but I believe it should have its place.

Would I have been horrified if my then-future-husband had presented me such a reductive read over dinner a deux? Most certainly. I’m a romantic — but now I am also a pragmatic realist — and I’m beginning to see the prenup as something closer to Cupid with a clipboard than Cupid with a bow.

Hear me out...

Coming Around Again

Looking at current trends - the only demographic that are seeing the divorce stats rise are the over-50s – the ‘silver splitters’. This is a time when a potential partner is likely to have accumulated substantial earnings, family inheritances, or indeed a divorce settlement.

Second chapter love affairs are prime for prenups to my mind to protect their own children’s inheritance, and guard against potential frosty family relations… I’m seeing love bloom later in life for so many – and anxiety simultaneously bloom for their family members in the wings.

Should a parent find a second chapter soul mate – wouldn’t it be wonderful for their children to be able to celebrate for them, rather than fear a sideways slippage of the family wealth? A timely address of the inheritance elephant in the room can make or break later life family relations.

Prenups as Protection, Not Punishment

Isn’t it sometimes prudent, and fair, where there are children from previous marriages to protect that prenups would be a welcome addition to a couple, so the couple in turn are a welcome addition to the wider family?

It is hard for children to celebrate their parents newfound happiness when they see large parts of their inheritance potentially going sideways to the new amour...

And for those who might be meeting a beau who has felt hard done by or ‘stung’ in a previous marital exit, should the prenup find itself centre to constructive conversations it might just mean that that eligible lover will enter another marriage where they otherwise might not have. A peace of mind prenup might just be the peace of mind that gets them to the church at all.

So, this Valentine’s Day, maybe Cupid deserves a clipboard after all. Later-life romantics — for whom the best might still be to come — you’re welcome. ❤️

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